Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Once Upon a Time IT WAS WAR

**Disclaimer: I just reread this and am aware of all the run-on sentences, quick pace, etc. This is what happens when I choose Mountain Dew from the vending machine when I meant to get Dr Pepper and work neighbor won't give me money to buy another one. I know work neighbor is going to be all "but you didn't ask me for more money so it's not my fault and oh by the way you're really pretty" but some things work neighbor's should just know amiright?**

Have I mentioned that I have asthma?

Yeah, I think it was a Christmas present in Kindergarten or something like that. A close second best gift ever would probably be when I found out I was allergic to paint in 7th grade. Won't ever forget priming for 3-4 hours straight one day then waking up the next day (my birthday) with a swollen splotchy face and going to the doctor's office. Going to the doctor's office was extra worse because until probably my senior year of high school I went to a pediatrician's office. During those impressionable teen years I felt so uncool sitting in a clown room. When I got my physical for track (I know not even kidding...I was on the track team for a season..."unfortunately" I had 2 foot surgeries which ended my running career...this'll come full circle eventually) they realized I was due for tetanus and hepatitis B shots. (Hepatitis B is the one everyone's supposed to get and there are like 3 of them, right? If not, I'm afraid I might've just really embarrassed myself). Well I have a fear of needles (I'm the most cautious person using a safety pin) so of course I start crying when they're giving me the shots, and I walked out of the pediatricians office crying with two bandaids and a sticker. You might be shocked to hear that I was not a cool kid in high school.

What was I talking about? Oh yeah, asthma. My asthma is mostly environmentally induced. It wasn't severe so not a huge deal to grow up with. As long as I had my emergency inhaler around I was fine. However especially after reading/watching Lord of the Flies and seeing what Piggy(?) had to go through "sucks to your ass-mar!" I took it upon myself to stand up for him and others who would be made fun of by abusing the condition if I wanted to sleep in a couple of mornings or if they expected me to do something crazy during track practice (sometimes, they wanted me to run a full 400m then do it again after only having a few seconds to catch my breath). When I moved to Hawai'i where the environment doesn't really change (other than allergies, etc) I stopped wheezing or showing any signs of asthma and stopped carrying inhalers altogether. I was free. I had "grown out" of it.

Or. So. I. Thought.

Fast Forward to my recent move to the Springs. I decide to be a big girl and go play pick up ultimate when it was only in the high 30s. I pulled on these things Under Armour makes called "long sleeves" and "tights" to help achieve a fashion statement known as "layering." I put on a hat meant to actually keep my head warm and gloves and was ready to go. Only 3 of us showed up so we went to grab a beer (kind of the same thing as exercising...actually, I'm not even going to try and stretch that). I went home and was already dressed so I grabbed my old ipod and looked for "running" music. I figure a mix of Ciara and Bone Thugz n Harmony will have to do (don't judge me. I went through a lot of phases in college) and set out to pick back up my lost running career. I barely make it a half mile before I'm gasping for air and decide that's progress enough for the day and go back home. 3 hours later I was still wheezing and texted all 7 (yes, I had 7 friends by this time) of my friends to see who had an inhaler.

Well the weather is getting nicer so the wheezing has subsided a bit, but when we have the overnight 50 degree drops in day-to-day temperature I feel like the Springs atmosphere is just laughing at me. Excuuuse me if I take a beautiful 80 degree weekend followed by 30 degrees and snowfall as a personal attack on my breathing. Finally someone pulled through and got their hands on a couple inhalers so I should be fine now. You'll have to try harder, Colorado Springs. You definitely aren't making a friend out of me this way.

Colorado Springs score: 3 (-1 for false hope of springtime)

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