Thursday, December 13, 2012

Once Upon a Time I Survived My First Year

This is a couple weeks late but I did it. I made it my first year in Coldorado. How did I celebrate? I tried snowboarding! I bought a season pass and got a season gear rental so I knew I was going to force myself to go fall down a mountain at least 5 times this season so I could get my money's worth. (Because falling down a mountain is usually something people pay hundreds of dollars for). That, and I was really proud of how I bought all of my snowboarding clothes/things to keep me warm for less than $300. That's right. Thanks to Steep and Cheap and The Clymb and REI rewards cards I got quality stuff for way less than I anticipated! I should get paid for this.

I've been twice now to Keystone Resort and it has been...interesting. I have this pattern of getting really frustrated with myself in the morning and snapping at the boy handsome bearded man who is trying to teach me, then breaking for lunch and a beer, then having a more successful afternoon so I leave for the day feeling like I have a shot of actually being able to do this one day. Not to mention the bearded man has learned to keep a pocket full of treats (chocolate, gummy sharks and/or bears, etc.) to reward me when I do well or to comfort me when I suck. This weekend I am moving on from the magic carpet...although I will miss all of the adorable little kids learning how to ski/snowboard. They are seriously so cute, except for the one who seemed to always fly past me when I fell...I sensed he was judging me big time. Show off.

Oh - and I'm also proud to say that I attempted the chair lift last weekend and NAILED IT. I didn't fall getting off, and didn't chicken out and sit down on my board to slide down the little hill AND I didn't hit the people at the bottom (kind of like an obstacle course that I a good way). Afterwards I of course started double-fist pumping declaring myself champion of the beginner chair lift but the bearded man cut me off to be all "that's great, but you have to move out of the way of the person behind you." I just assumed he was jealous because of the attention I was getting from other people acknowledging my feat staring at me and it probably took him awhile to get the hang of chair lifts. They're tricky...especially if you haven't quite mastered the awkward glide with one foot strapped in...which I almost-ish have.

Ooh well it's my feeding time. I also learned some snowboarder phrases this weekend so maybe conversation tonight will lend itself to my using them because telling someone "I'm going to shred the gnar" and "slay some pow pow" will sound completely natural coming from me.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Once Upon a Time Daylight Savings Tricked Me...Twice.

Cell phones are great because they automatically update for you when you change time zones. $10 Bed Bath and Beyond clocks are not great because they don't do anything but confuse you when trying to set either one or both of the alarms and don't come with Scramble With Friends.

One morning after the recent time change I forgot to set my phone alarm (because I'm too stupid to figure out my clock alarm). I wake up, look at the clock and panic because I was supposed to be at work an hour ago. (I try really hard to only be late 30 min. max) While brushing my teeth in a frenzy, I glance at my phone to see it is in fact an hour earlier and I was only supposed to be at work 10 min ago (phew!). I forgot that I never changed my room clock for Daylight Savings.

Next morning I forgot to set my phone alarm. I wake up, look at the clock and smile because I can sleep a few more minutes and take my time getting ready. While brushing my teeth in a calm, relaxed manner I glance at my phone to see it is in fact an hour later and I am late again. I forgot that I had corrected my room clock after the previous panic.

DST: 2
Kayleigh: 0

When I get home I'm making a sign that says "this clock is correct." I just hope I remember to take it down after the next time change.

The only other exciting thing happening right now is that my snowboard clothes are in. When I tried on my jacket for a seasoned snowboarder so he can make sure the fit is right, he moved my arms in a flailing motion to make sure I had room to flail/fall since it will be happening. A lot. What a clever seasoned snowboarder.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Once Upon a Time I Realized There Are Still Four Seasons

I grew up in Virginia. Virginia is a great state commonwealth. You have the mountains, beach, and four seasons that rotate on a pretty regular 3-month schedule for the most part. I knew this to be fact for the first 18 years of my life.

I went to school and worked for a bit in South Carolina. More specifically, Columbia. Home of my beloved Gamecocks in the fabulous south. About a year-ish before I left they changed the slogan to "Famously Hot" which everyone who has lived there or driven through in July/August knows is just a nice (southern) way of saying the "Armpit of the South" Sigh. That armpit was my home for 5 years and I loved it. Shorts/t-shirts until December, then sporatic for a couple months until March when they were back in season for good? Yes, please. I'm a warm weather gal and didn't miss fall/spring too much to be honest. There was beach season and the season-that-must-not-be-named in my book.

So 5 years later I up and move to Hawai'i to pursue my dream of weathergirl. After discovering there isn't much challenge to memorizing "Highs in the 80s and Lows in the 70s with a chance of some light scattered showers" all year so I moved on from that dream. Hawai'i weather was perfect year round except for the couple of winter months when I needed to make sure I brought a long sleeve tshirt with me because 70 degrees at night with a slight breeze can be chilly. Summer year round was also great on the wardrobe and budget since I knew my clothes would be in season all the time. No questions as to how warmly I needed to dress in the morning before work. Just sifting through the cleanest pile of clothes and hoping that I didn't wear the same outfit already that week although to be honest none of my coworkers would've noticed. Except one for sure. But she's great and would just laugh at me then tell me to sit down while she straightened my hair because we had a work function that evening and I needed to be presentable.

Well now I've been in Colorado for 10 months and this month (especially the past week or two) has confirmed something that had become more of a myth. Seasons are still here. All of them. This month I was shocked to discover that autumn/fall was still a "thing." By this point, I had just assumed that fall no longer existed and it was merely a "Starbucks (long) holiday" to give reason for bringing back the pumpkin spice latte (PSL because I'm hip) so everyone can post pictures to facebook/instagram/bathroom stalls of their Starbucks cup (allegedly) full of PSL or other fall specialty drink. Yes I love colorful leaves and pumpking anything as much as the next person (unless the next person doesn't like those things, then the next next person...unless that pers--you get the idea...I'm just glad I caught myself before it got out of control) but there are still things that I'm not the hugest fan of.

Autumn is just one giant Catch-22 for me it seems.
I love the colorful leaves and raking them into piles to jump in....but I don't love being itchy afterwards with a side of asthma.
I love being able to wear scarves and perhaps even a vest/cardigan...but I don't love how confused my wardrobe gets since I don't have room in my closet for all of my clothes and have to trade out based on seasons...cold in the morning, warm during the day, cold at night? Anyone who knows me knows what can happen to a perfectly cute matching outfit when I get it in my head that I know how to layer.
I love being toasty warm in my car because of the heat...but I don't love that I'M USING HEAT IN MY CAR IN SEPTEMBER.
I love pumpkin carving...but I don't love when someone looks at my lit up (amateur) carving of a Marcus Lattimore jersey and asks "what is that?"
I love pumpkin spice lattes...but I don't love how often it doesn't get stirred so it's all latte at the top and all the pumpkin is at the bottom and it's too sweet for me to even know where the spice comes in.
I love seeing the snow cap on Pike's Peak...but I don't love--oh shit. That means winter is next, isn't it? I just purchased my ski pass so I can learn what all this hype is about snow on mountains but it was also not cheap so I can't afford any Christmas gifts. Consider my learning to snowboard your gift because if all goes well it will mean less rides for me on the winter/snow complain-train.
Alrighty, time to suck it up Hudson. The weather is getting cold. You knew this would happen. You will become Colorado tough. Remember how last night it was in the 50s and you didn't put on your fleece pullover? That's because you're tough. You can survive what people say will be a make-up winter for the "mild" one you experienced last year.
Alright, put me in coach...into hibernation where I can snuggle up in my bed and not come out until spring.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Once Upon a Time I Thought I Might Be a Guy Magnet

...except replace guy with natural disaster.

All I'm saying is the two springs when I lived in Hawaii we had tsunami scares. I move last winter, and was there a tsunami scare this past spring? (please note I'm using seasons for a frame of reference, not because Hawaii actually has seasons). Now I'm in Colorado and this is the year of the wildfires. Don't worry Californians, I am not planning to move out there. Y'all have enough smaller earthquakes already without me...not to mention I have no desire to put up with the ridiculous SEC vs.PAC 10 12 arguments (if you can call it that) much less deal with who the "real" USC is (it's South Carolina, by the way). One key difference is that the tsunamis never really turned into anything. This fire is definitely real.

 Let's time travel back to Saturday. After a fun night Friday including karaoke where I gave one of my more emotional performances of Bonnie Tyler's "Total Eclipse of the Heart" and a few hours sleep, I woke up early to get my friend to the airport. Then I drove back to the Springs and got some Chick Fil A breakfast. I get home ready to sleep but then a new friend was all "wanna do a hike or the incline or something" and I'm all "sure! I haven't done the incline yet!" I blame it on the tired. The incline is a mile straight up where you gain 2000ft in elevation. It's like Koko Head in that it's all steps from rail ties. For whatever reason I thought it would be fun to attempt this on a day when we were well into the 80s by 8am and were on the track to set heat records (which I think it did). When we're driving I almost suggested that we go do the Waldo Canyon Loop instead (the only other hike I've done...a leisurely 7 mi loop with some good shade breaks along the way) but I decide to just buck up and face the stairway to heat exhaustion. On the way up the incline there was no fire, then on the way down there was. I know the fire started as the "Pyramid Mtn" fire and they evacuated the hikers safely out of Waldo Canyon but my black belt skills are (admittedly) a little rusty so facing a possible arsonist (they don't know for sure the cause, but it wasn't lightening and there have been arson-fires around) in hand-to-hand combat was just not something I needed to add to my plate. What has happened since is better seen through pictures.

***These pictures aren't mine. Snagged from facebook, more specifically from a Gazette page. Pictures are credited on the fb album.
Most Likely from Saturday, the first day

This picture is from a friend's fb,
but I don't like to use names on here so I'll call her M.

Looks like the incline...that stupid, stupid incline... 

On Tuesday evening, homes started to burn. I believe some belong to coworkers and other coworkers live nearby. 

I'm a couple miles from the mandatory evacuation line so have started to at least pack up some important items. I'm on the phone with my mom last night:

Me: Don't worry, I'm going to pack up important things like my birth certificate, passport, koozie collection and laptop

Mom: Stay safe, and oh! Bring that cute dress I send you too! You can't let that burn.

At least priorities are in check.

Needless to say the theme around here is pray. Pray for the firefighters (a co-worker's husband went to join the front lines last night). Pray for their families. Pray for the evacuees and that they are all safe because buildings can be rebuilt. Pray for the city/state/fed officials involved as they try to balance keeping us informed and endless inquiries all while still being responsible for managing/running a city. Pray for rain (sans wind).

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Once Upon a Time I Was Reminded that I Don't Understand Fashion

Another fabulous girls weekend is in the books for me and the college BFFs. This year we went to California to visit the BFF who I lived with all 4 years of college then some until she got married. It was sad when she was moving out. It kind of felt like a break up as we were trying to figure out who actually owned what movies (we developed quite the collection) or who gets to take the needlepoint hanging we bought at Goodwill because we didn't really know how to decorate walls with nice stuff. And we told people my grandmother made it so they'd feel bad if they laughed at it. Ahhh memories.

Well we were going to hang in San Francisco one day. One stop on the docket was the mission district so the stylish NY friend could get her fill of hipsters. Stylish NY friend and photography friend were on top of their wardrobes and wore their skinny jeans and flats/boots (respectively). Since (I think) I know what's "on trend" after 6 months on the mainland, I decide to wear my skinny jeans too. I still don't own boots for them because I just don't think my feet/calves can handle it (that's a different story) but I figured my slippahs would work just fine.

We get out of the car in San Fran and I noticed something subtle, but different between my skinny jeans and the 2349834987 other people around wearing them. Mine didn't hug my leg all the way down. Starting around the knee, mine just sort of went straight down. I didn't want my BFFs to know that I was just realizing this (not to mention one BFFs 5mo baby was with us and I'm pretty sure I nailed my "cool aunt" first impression and didn't want to ruin that) so I played it off in conversation:

me: [...]yeah there was the time when I realized that what I thought was my obligatory pair of skinny jeans weren't actually skinny jeans....what do you call the jeans I'm wearing? I'm pretty sure it's boot cut.

stylish NY friend: those are straight leg.

me: yeah I wouldn't ever wear boots with these. How embarassing (note to self: NEVER admit to tucking these straight leg jeans into those cheap snow boots you bought that came to a weird, non-in-style height)

Needless to say I did not blend in with the hipsters, at all.

Now I have Googled "are straight leg jeans in style" and can't get a straight answer. (I love puns! Especially unintended ones! I went back and italicized it once I realized what I did there). All that comes up are ads for Chicos, JC Penneys, and some of those "cool mom" blogs where the mom is all "I refuse to wear mom jeans! I wear straight leg!" Apparently a lot of moms wear straight leg as an anti-mom jean movement but I ask you this:

If moms are all wearing straight leg, does that make straight leg jeans the new mom jean?! I kind of think so. go to pair of jeans are mom jeans. Of course I discover this right after I was assured that it's ok to buy clothes with a Talbots label even though I'm only mid 20s and not a mom or married.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Once Upon a Time I FounsdfjsdkljfzzzZZZZzzz...sorry I fell asleep.

This will probably be scatterbrained because my medication should be wearing off and I have half a Chick Fil A chicken salad sandwich staring at me and because of said medication I can't decide if I'm hungry or not (my mind is telling me yes but my body is telling me no) is so confusing and I hate this because I love CFA and I know there are people in other places who can't have CFA on a whim (granted that whim isn't on Sunday) like Hawai'i so I shouldn't let it go to waste. This is a good enough reason for me to not do drugs. Except in this case if I don't do drugs I'll just fall asleep all day at work. I know that sounds awesome, but the people who fund my salary probably wouldn't think so. Maybe if I put together a really good powerpoint I can convince them...good thing I have drugs to keep me awake and alert to prepare said powerpoint.

The point is I have finally been diagnosed with narcolepsy. I typically wouldn't broadcast this on the internets, but anyone who has even been around me for a few short hours has picked up on my incredible almost super-power-like ability to fall asleep. Anywhere. Anytime.

In college I had a roommate who was diagnosed and immediately our other roommates assumed me to be the same way. The roommate (whom we affectionately referred to as "Narcy") and I had very similar habits and it wasn't until after her sleep study were other people all "something's wrong with your brain, too" and I was all "too much awesome? I don't see anything wrong with that" and they're all "it's not normal to fall asleep while under your bed when all you were doing was retrieving a shoe" and I was all "umm whatever, I'm going to take a quick 2hr nap."

In the next 5 years I continued to have the same issues but just dealt with it. I was tired of trying to explain to people what I was experiencing when certain symptoms were "flaring up" so to speak, but got a little annoyed when people would just respond with "yeah whatever, just sounds like laziness to me." The only people who seemed to really understand my struggle were people with similar focus/alertness issues such as ADD. I am a motivated person. I like to get things done. So it is extremely frustrating when my day is spent lying in bed 3-4 hours after I wake up because I don't even have the willpower to get up and pee no matter how bad I have to go, just to wake up, pee, walk downstairs and lay down "for a minute" on the sofa. A couple hours later, perhaps drifting in and out of TV shows (if the remote was within arms reach from the sofa) I'll get up, wanting to do something with my day. I would think about going to the beach (to nap, of course) but if I had to take the bus, even the thought of walking to the bus stop was enough to tire me out so I'd usually end up back on the sofa, angry with myself and wondering why I can't physically make myself clean my room like I had planned on. I wanted a clean room. It would be very easy too and not take much time at all. Just putting away clothes, taking some trash outside and vacuuming. But instead I was able to catch bits and pieces (when I wasn't asleep) of Sleepless in Seattle for the umpteenth time.

There were/are also times when I feel like I'm letting my friends down and for no good reason other than I just got tired. If I'm out and about and engaged, I'm usually good. Once I sit down after a day of work for 5 minutes, I'm done. If I start getting tired, it is a slippery slope and there is no coming out of it. I got pretty good and coming up with excuses to back out, then feeling crappy about it later. This was especially so if I missed an event celebrating a birthday or new job, etc.

I never felt depressed or anything. Just tired, and often times sleep would be physically irresistable and my ability to will myself to do anything was gone.

The past couple of months it has been especially tough. I was going entire weeks where I felt like I maybe did a couple hours worth of work total. This was not my nature and it was very frustrating. I always prided myself on how I never got stressed out and was able to maintain a cool head and cross of my to do list no matter how long. At first I refused to admit even to myself that something was wrong and I just kept up my usual routine of everything's great and always had a witty remark on hand. Every morning and even moreso, every afternoon around 3pm I would turn into a bobble head falling asleep at my desk and could not shake it. I would drink Mountain Dew, get 5-6 shots in my Starbucks, suck down candy hoping I would find something that would give me at least a burst of energy to get things done. None of this worked. I was not on top of things and this caused anxiety because I'm still new at this job and this was not the work ethic I boasted of when I interviewed for the position. Thankfully I have a great boss who I felt like I could at least try to explain what was going on and he was very gracious and understanding when I said I was going to go to a doctor to see if it can be figured out.

A blood test and sleep study later and I'm now on a stimulant to help get me through work (or long periods of driving). I didn't really know what to expect, but based on what I've read so far about the medication either my body is handling it well (despite the appetite thing...but we'll blame that on Henry my tapeworm) or I will require a higher dosage than "typical" for adults. It's just my first week so I'm still adjusting. I'm already seeing an improvement in my ability to stay alert and focused on what I'm doing. Whereas the medication does help me focus, I still get to choose what I focus on. A fingernail tears, and next thing you know, 10 minutes later I'm still shaping it and making sure it is the most smooth and even nail ever...even if it is now practically whittled down to the nub and I'm just going to chew on it later. I'm thinking I should just put a shiny object on my work tasks to keep bringing me back....

Okay, this wasn't meant to get serious but it did. It is funny to me that people's suspicions are "officially" true, and I'm just glad that I'm feeling more myself again--especially at work. I tried telling my boss that if I'm 5x as productive now that ought to translate to 5x my salary but he just laughed and said "uhhhh yeeahhh...let's talk about that later." which, sarcasm aside, isn't a definitive "NO" so I'm praying for that one in a million chance. I can feel my last pill wearing off since I'm yawning again and I finally ate the rest of the sandwich. So I'm gonna stop talking before I falsdlkfjsdlkjcfksdjlzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.............

Colorado Springs score: 3 (+2 for fixing my brain!)

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Once Upon a Time It Was "The Birds" All Over Again...almost...sort of

So I hate scary movies...even the ones that are supposed to be scary but everyone's all "whatever it wasn't scary." That being said, I've never actually watched Hitchcock's The Birds and have no intention of doing so. I do however know the premise of this movie and it scares the shit out of me.

Remember when I was getting all happy about the weather warming up? Well apparently in Colorado I'm not the only one who loves it. Moths apparently do, too. Saturday night I get home late and am exhausted, ready to climb into my bed when I turn on the light in my room and a SWARM of moths start fluttering about. The little moth-erf******s were having a party in MY bedroom and I wasn't even invited. I called a friend to ask what I'm supposed to do but I keep interrupting him with worst-case scenarios involving waking up with my face half eaten by moths and he's all "I'm trying to comfort you and be supportive but you're making it difficult!" and I'm all "have you seen The Birds? They are just waiting for me to go to sleep so they can bring in the army and attack." then he's all "moths don't have razor beaks" and I'm all "you don't know that....shut up."

So I resolve to let them have my room for the night (hospitality is one of my gifts) and left the light on to contain them, and I slept on an air mattress in the living room. I woke up Sunday morning and right before I start getting ready for church, I decide it is a good idea to Google "moth infestations." Well church was placed on the back burner as I start freaking out about the moth party I allowed to happen the night before. I don't know much about moth parties, but if this one got crazy who knows how many eggs were laid and if there was larvae feasting on my clothes. Anxiety kicked into full swing (I am more and more my father's child) and I imagine the worst and immediately start re-washing all of my clothes and putting my wool jacket in the freezer (I work for a non-profit...I can't afford clothes...okay I can afford clothes but I'd rather spend my money on other stuff instead). I thought it was a good idea to read up on as many moth infestation horror stories I could find for tips (although none seemed to have a happy ending resulting in no more moths...). I also spent the better part of the sabbath murdering the stupid things but when I killed one, 2 more seemed to come out. Not only was I losing the battle, I was slowly losing my sanity (okay, slightly dramatic but it didn't seem so at the time). I called up work neighbor who came over to help calm me down. We took a walk around the block because I needed to be out of the house then she braved the war zone with me.

When we got into my room, each of us armed with a shoe, at first I thought the moths had gotten smarter. They were "stationed" in hard to squish places, unlike the ones I had been killing who just landed on walls. I was wondering how they could learn so quickly then it hit me.

I had been killing the dumb moths all day. They had sent in the front lines to see how I would respond and now the smarter ones were moving in. Even worse, by killing the dumb ones, I was only aiding in survival of the fittest which means only the smart moths are left to breed which will result in even smarter moths. Then what if these smarter moths learn how to develop razor beaks so they can become the 21st century birds. I mean, isn't remaking old movies the "in" thing right now?

Anyway, I did eventually learn that apparently this time each year miller moths are in a migratory pattern to higher elevation and this is the worst it's been in 5-6 years. Also they aren't the clothes eating kind - just a nuisance and everyone has stories of them flooding their houses.This did calm me down a bit (although I am in the processing of sealing off windows in my room and have yet to sleep in there since this weekend) but with my recent thought process of what the future holds for these things I'm still a bit uncomfortable. I guess I can at least take my jacket out of the freezer.

Colorado Springs score: 1 (-2 because NOBODY WARNED ME ABOUT THE MOTH-ERF*****S)

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Once Upon a Time IT WAS WAR

**Disclaimer: I just reread this and am aware of all the run-on sentences, quick pace, etc. This is what happens when I choose Mountain Dew from the vending machine when I meant to get Dr Pepper and work neighbor won't give me money to buy another one. I know work neighbor is going to be all "but you didn't ask me for more money so it's not my fault and oh by the way you're really pretty" but some things work neighbor's should just know amiright?**

Have I mentioned that I have asthma?

Yeah, I think it was a Christmas present in Kindergarten or something like that. A close second best gift ever would probably be when I found out I was allergic to paint in 7th grade. Won't ever forget priming for 3-4 hours straight one day then waking up the next day (my birthday) with a swollen splotchy face and going to the doctor's office. Going to the doctor's office was extra worse because until probably my senior year of high school I went to a pediatrician's office. During those impressionable teen years I felt so uncool sitting in a clown room. When I got my physical for track (I know not even kidding...I was on the track team for a season..."unfortunately" I had 2 foot surgeries which ended my running career...this'll come full circle eventually) they realized I was due for tetanus and hepatitis B shots. (Hepatitis B is the one everyone's supposed to get and there are like 3 of them, right? If not, I'm afraid I might've just really embarrassed myself). Well I have a fear of needles (I'm the most cautious person using a safety pin) so of course I start crying when they're giving me the shots, and I walked out of the pediatricians office crying with two bandaids and a sticker. You might be shocked to hear that I was not a cool kid in high school.

What was I talking about? Oh yeah, asthma. My asthma is mostly environmentally induced. It wasn't severe so not a huge deal to grow up with. As long as I had my emergency inhaler around I was fine. However especially after reading/watching Lord of the Flies and seeing what Piggy(?) had to go through "sucks to your ass-mar!" I took it upon myself to stand up for him and others who would be made fun of by abusing the condition if I wanted to sleep in a couple of mornings or if they expected me to do something crazy during track practice (sometimes, they wanted me to run a full 400m then do it again after only having a few seconds to catch my breath). When I moved to Hawai'i where the environment doesn't really change (other than allergies, etc) I stopped wheezing or showing any signs of asthma and stopped carrying inhalers altogether. I was free. I had "grown out" of it.

Or. So. I. Thought.

Fast Forward to my recent move to the Springs. I decide to be a big girl and go play pick up ultimate when it was only in the high 30s. I pulled on these things Under Armour makes called "long sleeves" and "tights" to help achieve a fashion statement known as "layering." I put on a hat meant to actually keep my head warm and gloves and was ready to go. Only 3 of us showed up so we went to grab a beer (kind of the same thing as exercising...actually, I'm not even going to try and stretch that). I went home and was already dressed so I grabbed my old ipod and looked for "running" music. I figure a mix of Ciara and Bone Thugz n Harmony will have to do (don't judge me. I went through a lot of phases in college) and set out to pick back up my lost running career. I barely make it a half mile before I'm gasping for air and decide that's progress enough for the day and go back home. 3 hours later I was still wheezing and texted all 7 (yes, I had 7 friends by this time) of my friends to see who had an inhaler.

Well the weather is getting nicer so the wheezing has subsided a bit, but when we have the overnight 50 degree drops in day-to-day temperature I feel like the Springs atmosphere is just laughing at me. Excuuuse me if I take a beautiful 80 degree weekend followed by 30 degrees and snowfall as a personal attack on my breathing. Finally someone pulled through and got their hands on a couple inhalers so I should be fine now. You'll have to try harder, Colorado Springs. You definitely aren't making a friend out of me this way.

Colorado Springs score: 3 (-1 for false hope of springtime)

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Once Upon a Time I Wasn't Losing a Spunky Old Lady--I Was Gaining a Grandmother

Some conversations between me and my new adopted grandmother:

Me: Do you have any grandchildren?

Spunky Old Lady (SOL): Yes, 5.

Me: Do you like any of them?

SOL: ...uh..ummm...well....why do you ask?

Me: I was thinking that if the position of "favorite grandchild" was available, you should adopt me!

SOL: Well...sure! I can have 6 grandkids.

Me: Great!


SOL Grandmother: You know, I wanted to tell you about my one son who once told the doctor he was my favorite.

Me: It's okay for you to already have a favorite child, I'm your favorite grandchild. Don't think I didn't notice yesterday when you avoided my question regarding liking any of your first 5 grandchildren...


Grandmother: I saw a picture of [coworker's] dog and said it was ugly. I meant as in "cute ugly"...phew...I cleverly recovered from that one...


Me: Grandmother! You finally found my desk!

Grandmother: Yes, I realized I didn't know where you sat. I confused you with that blonde upstairs. What do you do, anyway?

Me: Accounting...right now preparing monthly reports for managers--

Grandmother: Interesting....anyway, there are three boxes of Girl Scout cookies on [coworker's] desk. Do you want to just to grab a box or do you want me to go take one and bring it to you?

Me: Oh, I'll go take one...I have no problem stealing a box of cookies from [coworker's] desk.

Grandmother: and that's why you're my granddaughter.

I haven't had a grandmother since 6th grade! My actual grandmother was a fabulous lady whom I loved dearly but I think she'd be OK with this adoption. Especially since I was her favorite, too (sister and/or brother: let's agree to disagree on that statement). Grandmother is quite a spitfire and so I know she'll keep me on my toes which is good. Also grandmother's timing is perfect since my own mother will not send me a surprise case of Girl Scout cookies this year. I know it isn't secretly on its way because my mom cannot keep secrets so I would've known by now. dad was sending me a case of Girl Scout cookies! But if that was the "case" (ha - get it!) I wouldn't find out about it because he'd forget he sent them to me...if he remembered to send them at all. Not to mention I have his sweet tooth so he's actually probably eating my case of Girl Scout cookies knowing that I'll assume he forgot to send them and forgive him.

Well played, dad.

Colorado Springs score: 4 (+1 for grandmothers!)

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Once Upon a Time, I Baptized My Desk...Again.

One time this happened:
The hot tea spill of Feb '12. I don't even like hot tea. Clearly it's mutual.

This was the first "major" incident. My work neighbor (she sits in the cube next to me and is the lucky recipient of an almost-daily pun inspired by findings on the free table. She will continue to receive these puns until she appreciates them and finds them...punny! Because we all know puns are funny, especially when you have to explain them) then reminded me that the last few times I spilled on myself I was wearing the same gr(e/a)y pants. I love those pants so I guess spillage is an assumed risk when I wear them, I just wish I remembered this so I could also remember to wear darker shirts with them instead of my favorite white sweater.

Ever since, spilling on myself has been more frequent and less-discriminatory based on what pants/sweater combo I'm wearing at the time (since NONE of my winter-appropriate skirts/dresses pass dress code ... but I'm over it, really...). I even filled up my University of South Carolina (GO COCKS!) travel mug, closed the lid, and walked it to my desk with two hands...but I guess I should've "locked" the air hole thing because somehow my coffee/hot chocolate mix jumped up through the blow air hole and onto my new vest. (Yes, I'm wearing vests now which is so CO of me).

Then there's today. Lady comes to water plant in work neighbor's desk, but said plant is unstable and is thus knocked over into my cubicle (I'm pretty sure work neighbor staged it that way, but I have no proof). Work neighbor and I laugh WITH lady because it isn't her fault (since it is work neighbor's fault) then I manage to do this:

Ignore the baby wearing a hat on my screen--work neighbor
is responsible for that. But I will take this opportunity to tell
you to put a hat on your damn baby when it's 30 degrees outside.

At least this time it was water (although I'm pretty sure electronics don't care what type of liquid it is...). Luckily I still had the hand towel I took from the kitchen thrown under my desk so it was able to come to the rescue. Work neighbor noted how I seemed to have this regular ritual of baptising my desk. Upon saying this, I realized this makes great sense. I screwed up the baptism before by using hot tea instead of water. Everyone knows it would be ridiculous to do a baptism by hot-tea submersion because hot tea is disgusting and you wouldn't want to risk accidentally ingesting some of it. Now that I think about it though, for the sprinkle-baptism hot tea might be a better choice because isn't it supposed to be good for your hair? (Or it contains mercury...I feel like most products fall into one of these two categories. I just wish I could remember which one. In the meantime, I'll keep washing my hair with old lead-based paint I found and mixed with dishwashing soap that I kept in an original nalgene bottle.) I guess if you were an infant you wouldn't have much hair (if any) so this point would be moot. Alrighty, decision made: I still think water is the way to go.

I know this is the type of adventurous activity that mom wanted to read about on this blog. I did go rock climbing for the first time, but this just seemed more interesting to write about. Also, I'm on some drugs for my stuffy nose/face/head from whatever I caught on the plane back from NY last weekend.

Also: I didn't spill on myself nearly as much when I lived in Hawai'i...just sayin'...

And because of that: Colorado Springs score: 1 (-1 from the last snow...which I should take away that point because we didn't get a snow day).

Updated Colorado Springs score: 3 (even though I didn't write about it, rock climbing in Buena Vista was pretty fun and I've enjoyed going to the climbing gym in the springs since so I'll give it a +2).

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Once Upon aTime Colorado Actually Did Something Right

It's snowing right now. Like, a lot. Soon it'll start looking like this:

I'm so excited. I know you're thinking but Kayleigh, you don't like the cold and don't care much for the snow because snow is often closely related to cold...and I say "mostly" because when you visited Harry Potter world in Orlando last week they had snow on the roofs of the shops of Hogsmeade but it was still 70 degrees outside which is your kind of snow conditions.

Well, I have to accept that it is going to snow in Colorado. Until I am able to hit the slopes on my journey of transforming from awesome surfer chick to even more awesome snowboarder chick (it's a new concept for a movie that I want to pitch...people will be drawn in as I struggle with my new environment, surrounded by haoles who think me and my hawaiian ways are weird, and I'm going to have dad issues that will be resolved by a tearful moment where we have no choice but to pull together because we're family and that's what's important. But don't take my word for it!) I'm not going to be the biggest fan. Except this time.

This is probably the most perfectly timed snowfall I've ever experienced. We're all pretty much banking on a snow day tomorrow. I haven't had a 5 day work week since maybe mid-December. Last week was a 1 day work week, and this week has been dragging and I blame it on the fact that I'm expected to show up every single day. These "regular" work weeks have got to be eased into. So, tomorrow I'm really hoping I can stay curled up on my air matress for a couple extra hours no matter how badly I need to pee or want cheez-its. (note to self: keep cheez-its in arms reach of air matress tonight).

Second, I didn't have any real plans this weekend for snow to interfere with! Sure, it would've been nice to get a hike in or set up camp at the movie theatre to be first in line for the next Twilight movie (spoiler alert: apparently Gandolf has an exclusive club of friends and he won't let Hagrid come hang unless he does the truffle shuffle!) Next weekend I'm going to hang in Buena Vista in the mountains, so lots of snow would suck then. This weekend however I was hoping to be motivated to get some stuff done around the apartment and if snow keeps me at home and I have yet to get appropriate snow apparel to play in it then I'll have no choice but to stay inside and catch up on my shows on Hulu  get my "to do" list done.

I also managed to go grocery shopping last night so I even have food to eat. The dog dodged a bullet there. (kidding...the dog doesn't seem to have much meat on him so I think it'd hardly be worth the effort) (but seriously, I love dogs. Not in the "I love to eat dogs" kind of get what I'm trying to say)

Basically the point of this rambling: where can I pick up some flavored syrups so I can set up an Ono Shave Ice stand once we get all of this snow? I hear organic is really in...and what's more organic than a cone filled with snow from heaven itself? And it's cheaper than Whole Foods.

Colorado Springs score: 2 (I never thought I'd give promerits for snow this early in the game. Well played, Springs)

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Once Upon a Time I Went on a Little Hike

So the anticipation is over. I went on my first CO hike last weekend. (Well, 2nd. I can't forget going up the side of a mountain with 500 high school kids/leaders a few years ago...even though I'd kinda like to. I don't want to forget the beautiful views and the time spent with kids conquering it blah blah...but still. I digress).

One of my new friends and I (who will be appropriately referred to as "SC friend" because she is from SC) decided to go on a mild 7mi hike on Saturday called Waldo Canyon Loop. It was pretty touristy with plenty of company, but still some good exercise. You go for roughly 1.5mi then you come to the loop and a decision. Left or Right. It "loops" back onto itself so it really doesn't matter which way you go. However, I did want to point out that it actually looped because I do like when hiking trails back up their name. I looked and was unable to find "Waldo" but that should've been expected. He's that good. Or I was that bad at those books. Either way, based on a suggestion from a friend we went Right. I don't regret this decision but in retrospect his logic doesn't make sense so I kind of wish I would've just gone with my trusted coin-flip method. Anyway, it was good for the first couple miles of the loop but then we ran into some fellow hikers who had chosen to start left:

Hikers: Is it icy up ahead?

Us: Umm.. a few small patches but nothing treacherous

Hikers: OK, good. Well, good's pretty sh*tty for the next mile. Lots of ice. We were sliding a good bit. Nothing but ice...

Us: ...thanks...awesome...whoseideawasthishikeanyway?

Needless to say they were right, but we made it after only one legitimate fall each, some squat-shuffling and other adaptive hiking-on-ice maneuvers. I'm just glad that I decided to eat my banana and cheese crackers snack before the icy part or Henry would've been pissed the entire time.

I wasn't really sore the next day which is a bummer but it was still enjoyable. I'll try to remember to put up two pictures later. (don'tcountonit)

In other news, yesterday I discovered I was inadvertantly wearing the middle part. I know I recently got my hair did but maybe the highlights went straight to my head (I'll take credit for that pun) and it thought it could pull it off. I don't know what my hair was thinking, but it goes without saying that I'm no Jennifer Aniston:

Me with a wavy-hair-middle-part
So Jealous.

Well that's all for now. I just signed up for a "Learn to Curl" clinic which I'm really excited about.

Colorado Springs score: 1 (which is +2 from before...I gave it a bonus point because I could wear whatever I wanted on the hike)

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Once Upon a Time I Got Sent Home

OK you're in luck. Something already happened to me. I'm not ashamed to admit publicly that I have to go home and change because I violate dress code. I didn't know they sold "inappropriate" pencil skirts (which is what I'm wearing at least for the next 15 minutes until I find a nice pair of pleated, tapered slacks). I guess this makes up for my lack of rebellion in high school. Can dress code violations be the new after school detentions?

I love old ladies, but not the ones who complain to HR about my inch above the knee professional skirt.

At least I can still wear "gauchos" and "skorts" (because they make a lot of knee-length skorts) as those are explicitly listed in the "acceptable" column. Phew.

At least we still have casual Fridays....for now.

Colorado Springs score: -1

***DISCLAIMER: If you work for the same organization as I do (specifically in HR) please know that I do respect the dress code and understand. This is just for a chuckle for those on the outside who know me and would think I'd get sent home for things like eating all of the M&Ms and raisins out of a community bowl of trail mix leaving only peanuts and a few pretzels instead...not inappropriate dress.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Once Upon a Time I moved to Colorado

...from Hawai'i. In December. I hate the cold. This should be fun.

Remember the old Hawai'i blog back when I moved there and it was fun and I did cool stuff like skydive and backpack a treacherous coastline and fly a plane? (Probably don't know about the last two because I never wrote about them...but they happened)...well, that is a blog of the past. Just like Hawai'i is now in the past. I've been to Colorado in the summer and enjoyed it and am determined to find things to do/try in the winter. I even have approx 2 friends now. My friend (not CO friend but childhood friend who moved to HI with me) and I joked about having a "BYOF" (Bring Your Own Friend) party back when we found ourselves in a similar predicament but we never followed through (typical). I might revisit that idea and require my friends to bring a new friend for me. Double my number of friends? Yes, please. But I'll have to cap it at 4 friends total, because my car only seats 5 including me.

I obviously don't have anything interesting right now. But my newest friend and I are planning to try hiking in 50 degree weather this weekend. If we don't just end up hiking to the nearest Starbucks/trashcan fire then I'll tell you about it.

For now, some videos:

...but wait there's more! worries there's still more!

...and still one more!'s over!